Hello everyone! I’m back, or so I’d like to think, as only time will tell if I’m able to update you regularly with my surreal experiences and convoluted thoughts on love, sex and dating. The last few months have been very busy (who needs doing extreme sports, when you can go flat hunting in London?), hence my disappearance from the blogging scene. However, just when I had interrupted my online dating given that my current interest had moved from a tall, Mediterranean hunk to a two bedroom flat in zone 2 or 3, I received an invitation that dragged me out of my dating pause.
I was approached by Zojul (http://zojul.com/) and invited to one of their quiz nights. Now, I think I am quite active on the socialising London life. I’ve been a member of several Meetup groups for a few years, and about 4 months ago I joined Thinkingbob as another way to meet new people while having fun. Yet, I had never heard of this Zojul before, a new concept developed only a few months ago by its founder Oliver.
Try to say “socialise” with a very strong German accent, cut the word in two and keep only the first part, and that’s how we get to “Zojul”, the aim of which is indeed socialising. Oliver’s brainchild aims to be a platform where people can meet in a stress free and fun way and get to know each other. Eventually, each person can then host their own event to which they can invite those they have connected more with.
The event I was invited to was a quiz night with a twist held in Sink Pong, East London. The twist comes from the fact that there are 5 rounds, each one with 5 questions and 15 minutes to complete it. If you answer the questions quickly, you have time to socialise with your team colleagues. For each round there is a winner, and then you receive a text that asks you to give a feedback on each member, saying which one you’d like to see again, and which table to go to for the next round. In practice, you get to meet 24 new people in a night (or more, if they come with their imaginary friends), while having fun.
At the end of the 5 rounds, you can enjoy a drink at the venue while talking with those people you have clicked more.
It was surely a very pleasant evening, so I would definitely recommend it to those who are interested in socialising and doing something new, especially because at the moment these events are still free.
However, I was invited as a dating blogger, so what’s my take on this with regards to dating potential?
Let me start by saying that playing and team work are a great way to bond with strangers, and when there is some complicity, something else might blossom. Plus, that’s what some of my friends keep repeating me, that you might meet the man of your life when you are finally not looking for that (meaning, you go out with the idea of doing a quiz night, and you meet Mr Right).
In order to introduce you to people that might correspond more to your tastes and interest, Zojul invites you to answer to 21 questions. I liked this part, especially in a period when I’m growing tired of Tinder empty profiles or dating app that do not ask you any information at all. Yet, this platform being at its beginning, I doubt they have already enough data to do a proper matchmaking.
The way the evening is organised requires you to check your mobile regularly, which seemed a bit odd, against the normal socialising etiquette, and the idea that we were giving a thumb up or down one another was a bit strange. Also, as it too often happens in these socialising events, women were higher in numbers than in men.
The biggest “problem” for me was the different expectations we all had. It’s true that one of the preliminary 21 questions was: “What are you expecting to get from the night?” (finding a special someone, getting new friends, etc), so I should have known that we were not all on the same page. I was reminded of this quite clearly by the first guy I went talking to, efore the quiz started. He asked me how I had heard about Zojul, I said I had been invited because I blog about dating, among other things, and that’s when he immediately made it clear: “Oh, I’m not here at all for dating, just to socialise”. It kind of curb my enthusiasm in getting to know other guys. At least, in other dating events you know you are all there for the same reason (and even so people might still be looking for so many different things, though they all fall under a “dating umbrella”). I felt like: “Yes, that guy is cool, but who ensures me that he is single and looking for love?”. I already battle with this question when I meet someone interesting in the tube, at the pub, in a club, at the supermarket, at the gym, at the library, at the farmer’s market…If I go out on a night that I approach saying that I’m hoping to finding love, I would want to be spared this initial obstacle of understanding what’s in his mind.
That’s when I felt mentally tired and decided to switch off my dating radar and just enjoy the night. Which I did, but came back home with the idea that if you are really serious in your love search, there are other more fruitful ways to spend your evening. However, if you just wanna meet new people, get on http://zojul.com/home/ and see if any event takes your fancy. Have fun!